“On August 20, 2016, my long-distance boyfriend and I were staring at a positive pregnancy test in disbelief. I felt completely consumed by fear, shame and hopelessness, and those all immediately made way for my selfishness: my career, my life, my reputation, my plan. I was not ready for this life that God created from our sin or the sacrifices that came with it. We were unprepared in every way. I was certain that God had gotten something wrong. This couldn’t be my story.
God has spent the last 9 months showing me that I was right– this isn’t my story, but His. Jesus has used this little Gospel-carrier inside of me to transform my heart every day since August 20th. He has shown me grace, unconditional love, peace, and steadiness through my now-husband, Tyler, whose eternal perspective and trust in God’s story for our family can only come from Jesus. He has shown our new family that He goes before us in all things, especially the really scary ones. Through our baby boy, we can tangibly see that He makes beautiful things out of the ashes of our brokenness.
God has also used our precious little boy to teach us hard things. Preparing for his arrival has revealed doubt, anxiety, loneliness, financial struggle, and lots of selfishness. Carrying him has been a constant reminder of my body being a living sacrifice for the Kingdom (being pregnant is hard, you guys).
I think that’s really the point, though, that every little life that God knits together makes all of the good stuff and the messy stuff richer. Our decision to choose life in the midst of our fear and weakness promised a lifetime of hard moments but it also promised more messy joys and goodness and gospel reminders. As we await our little boy’s arrival, we prayerfully prepare for all of the above.
Our little man’s story has transformed my understanding of what pro-life ministry is. It’s about the defenseless littles, but it is also so much about the moms. It is our job as defenders-of-life to fight the good fight alongside each scared new mom because the fear, shame, and hopelessness are real. God created mothers in His image. I’m humbled and honored that I get to bear that name. I’m grateful to Jesus that my little boy’s life will be a reminder to fight for every scared mama that makes a brave choice for life.”
– Kate #standforlife